My little sister Therese worked here for a lovely man named Jamie. She started working at the “Electric Candle” sometime in High School and travels through this little doorway pretty much made up a lot of her teenage years. She spent hours in the basement making candles and mixing the scents that combined were just an amazing sensory experience. Then she would come home from work (after school, after work, after one hell of a long day) and my Mother would wave her over to sit next to her on the couch in the living room. She just loved the scents would emanate from Therese, She wasn’t a hugger our Ma, she pretty much after 9 kids said “hands off” unless you needed medical attention, otherwise the stampede alone would have killed that tiny little thing. But I can still see her waving T. over and saying just how lucky she was to have such a hardworking daughter who always came home so cosy and wonderful smelling, and they would sit there quietly at the end of the couch with T. leaning up against Mommy’s side and Mommy reading her 18 ton book in her lap and smoking away, with an ashtray the size of a Wagon Wheel next to her, and T.’s little head of long hair tilted and cascading over her tired teen face dozing away by our Mommy’s side.
To give you a clue as to just how loving and cool our parents were (Dad was a police officer and Mom a nurse), I had people tell me later that the place Therese had worked was called a “Head Shop”. A Head Shop, I didn’t know what that meant…it meant it was a place you could buy papers, bongs, pipes stuff associated with pot. Of course you could also buy clothes, shoes, candles, jewelery and a raft of other stuff in here, by the looks of it even waterbeds! But the point is our Mom and Dad and how they loved, respected and trusted Therese and all us kids. A rare and wonderful thing in those days of “Hippies” and the ”Archie Bunker” mentality, our parents were phenomenal. I can remember my friends being amazed that I was able to ask my Mom for birth control at 16, only because she told me if I ever needed it to let her know. She wasn’t afraid of the facts of life. And she made sure her daughters weren’t either.
The best…years later my sisters went on to work for the local courts, on the right side of the law, and I’ve gone on to write about them and their amazing lives. Who would have ever believed the Bailiff was a bartender and the Court Employee a candlemaker. That they would turn out like they did…for crissakes, as a child, Therese made Wednesday Adams look normal.
My sisters… I am so proud of them and the lives they lead and the stories they tell and the wonderful children they have raised and just who they ARE. They have created whole universes from their fingertips, with their hard work, their faith and humor and I love ‘em. Mom used to say, “Don’t kill your sisters…someday you’ll need them.” Mom was right, and now I can’t think of what I would do without them.
Although I did devise some pretty amazing attempts on their lives when we were little…I’m glad they made it.
Photo courtesty of The Michael Schwartz Collection, Cleveland State University Library
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Why am I not surprised to find Erma Bombeck was born in February? Sweethearts to a man (or woman) All my favorite people were all born about this time of year…they’re all “Pisces” babies…Erma, Kate, Cas and Susan…there’s something magical about those Pisces…they see laughter and hope all around them. The air fairly sparkles with “might-be’s”… this might be, that might be, and always with a small smile, or quip that leaves you in stitches. They can relax more people with laughter and one raised quizzical eyebrow than all the Xanax in the world. God love ‘em. Valentines all around for these cute souls.
I’ve looked up a few quotes by Erma Bombeck to leave you chuckling…
“I haven’t trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I’ve never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.”
“I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms; “Checkout Time is 18 years”
“My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.”
She said; ‘If Mary had lived on our block we would have said, ” Of course she has time to go to the Dentist, she only has Jesus!”
“Sometimes I can’t figure designers out. It’s as if they flunked Human Anatomy.”
“A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend, and he’s a priest.”
“Seize the moment, think of all the women on the ’Titanic’ that waved off the dessert cart.”
“Housework if done right, can kill you.”
“Children make your life important.”
“Success, is outliving your failures.”
“If you can laugh at it, you can live with it.”
“Guilt; The gift the keeps on giving.”
“Families, the ties that bind and gag.”
On her childhood- “I was insanely busy going to school and being a servant to everyone else.”
On being a housewife; “You become about as exciting as the blender, the kids come in look you in the eye and ask if anybody’s home?”
During a Commencement speech she stated, “Most of you are going to be ordinary…you are not going to the Moon. You’ll be lucky to find the keys to your car in the back parking lot. But some of you are to be great things to yourselves. You are going to be the best friend someone ever had…”
When asked, “What do you hope your column will accomplish?” She responded, “Make ‘em laugh!”
In her March 10, 1987 column, she stated, “I always had a dream that when I am asked to give an accounting of my life to a higher court, it will go like this; “So, empty your pockets. What have you got left of your life? Any dreams unfufilled? Any unused talent that we gave you when you were born that you still have left ? Any unsaid compliments or bits of love that you haven’t spread around? And I will answer, “I’ve nothing left to return. I spent everything you gave me. I’m naked as the day I was born.”
What grace. What a soul, and how blessed are we to be able to still find her light shining through these years. You just have to look for it.
I think about Erma… and I think even God deserves a laugh now and then. And with Erma around, the heavens themselves will be tickled pink.
Bravo Pisces Babies Everywhere!!!!
Photo courtesy of The Michael Schwartz Collection at Cleveland State University Library
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nope, even he wouldn’t sell us out like this…it took these clowns to do it!
Photos courtesy of www.mojosteve.blogspot.com
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Nature abhors a vacuüm, but not as much as cats do. Jacquelyn Mitchard
In order to keep a true perspective of one’s importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him. Dereke Bruce
Cats regard people as warm-blooded furniture. Jacquelyn Mitchard
Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want. Joseph Wood Krutch
I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in two days. Bill Dana
I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of the cats is infinitely superior. Hippolyte Taine
I have felt cats rubbing their faces against mine and touching my cheek with claws carefully sheathed. These things, to me, are expressions of love. James Herriot
If toast always lands butter side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? Stephen Wright
Photograph Courtesy of Michael Schwartz Library , Cleveland State University Library, Cleveland Press Collection
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*Advice from my nephew Johnny to his Ma (my Kate) about hospitals. He said everything is pretty much O.K., until they get your underpants. Hard to boss those Doc’s around without underpants…
So hang onto those skivvies!!!!
Cartoon courtesy of Joc.ks.com
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